Prologue- Growing Up

I never imagined that I would want children. Throughout my upbringing and into adulthood, I was all about too preoccupied with my own chaos to even think about it. But here's the twist: life is a journey where you never truly have it all figured out, right? It’s a wild adventure where you learn to adapt and face challenges as they arise.

As for the idea of having kids? Sharing wasn’t exactly my forte—classic middle child syndrome. I had to share everything: my room, my toys,  my parents and their attention,  taking turns with the computer or TV. When you have siblings nothing is truly yours and I often felt like an invisible presence caught between my two brothers. 

I threw dramatic tantrums, yearning for a spotlight that seemed perpetually out of reach. My parents were fantastic, offering me countless opportunities, yet what I truly longed for was my their undivided attention. Mum was busy working hard to provide for us, and I failed to recognise the sacrifices she made—I only noticed her absence. My dad was a constant, he was creative and allowed us to run wild, he encouraged risk taking- much to my mother’s dismay. Her neves must have been in tatters watching us wiz around on motorcycles and swinging from the rafters in the workshop! Now, as a parent, I realise that perfection isn’t always achievable. I feel a deep sorrow for how challenging I made things for my parents, yet I can see the extraordinary lengths they went to create wonderful memories.

A cherished moment of elegance and love shared between a stunning mother and her little daughter. Me and my mother.

It all changed though when my baby bother was born. I was thirteen when this little human came into our family, I felt a love that I have never experienced before except for the cats and I knew from that point, one day I would be mum. I absolutely doted on him and was proud as punch when I took him places or picked him up from school. We were inseparable. My parents granted us a level of freedom that is rare today, and our sibling bond was incredibly close. We did everything together.

I consider myself extremely fortunate to have such amazing parents, who are my first source of support when I feel overwhelmed by the chaos of motherhood. They are first source for thinking up ways to entertain my own children, inspired by the freedom they gave us to explore and by the memories they created for us. My mother is my anchor, and during tough times, we’re always there for each other; I am grateful that our relationship has blossomed into a friendship.